Blogs
Pride Month is an exuberant, meaningful occasion for queer folks and their allies, but in order for all members of this global community to feel embraced as their full selves, we must prioritize body inclusion in Pride Month celebrations. Otherwise, we risk further disenfranchising those who could benefit from these safe and joyful spaces the most.
As someone who has struggled with mental health issues, I know how challenging it can be to maintain self-esteem. The summer solstice, the longest day of the year, provides a powerful metaphor for finding our inner light and strength. Just as the sun reaches its peak, illuminating our world, we too can harness this energy to bolster our self-esteem.
Rejection Sensitivity in general is difficult, but Rejection Sensitivity at work is especially hard since a certain level of professionalism is expected. I consider myself highly sensitive, so managing the fear of conflict or being disliked causes me tremendous anxiety, and it wasn't until recently that I finally felt I had a sense of control over my emotions in the workplace.
My name is Elizabeth Naraine, and I am excited to join the HealthyPlace community as a new author for "Treating Anxiety." Anxiety has affected me in different ways throughout my life. Beginning in the early years of elementary school, I experienced racing thoughts and a pit in my stomach before the day started. Throughout my teen and adult years, it evolved to constant worrying about my future, career outlook, and relationships. My goal with this blog is to help you feel supported and understood through the challenges of living with anxiety and offer a glimmer of hope that there are effective ways to treat anxiety and overcome it.
I've found that depression and isolation go together. I was responding to a comment on Jennifer Tazzi's blog post "What to Do When Depression Feels Like a Glass Wall" from several years ago. Her post inspired me to write about isolation and derpession because I could relate.
Have you heard of a life script? Changing your life isn't easy, especially when you seek change that stands the test of time. I have been struggling to make some changes, and in a recent therapy session, I learned a technique that can help anyone steer their life in the direction they want. It's called rewriting your life script, and it can transform your life in ways you never thought possible.
There are healthy alternatives to gambling, but building healthy habits as a recovering gambling addict is not easy. One day, you feel like it's all behind you, and the next, you are fighting the urge not to place that bet. This was me a couple of years back. Weeks and even months of abstinence would crumble at the allure of the casino until I realized that recovering from gambling addiction requires more than just abstaining from placing bets. Recovery also involves finding healthy alternatives to gambling, supporting your current lifestyle.
Preparing for a vacation can be particularly anxiety-inducing for me. There is so much to get done, many things to worry about, and, in my case, two little kids and a giant dog to care for on top of everything else. It is hard to stay motivated and get everything done without feeling brain fog and nausea. Below are six ways I handle my anxiety and vacation preparation in the summer months.
Goal-setting with borderline personality disorder can be difficult. Living with borderline personality disorder (BPD) feels like being trapped in an endless loop, where the same mistakes replay like a broken record. This seems to be true for me, especially when setting goals. Without smarter goal-setting in BPD, living up to my dreams and aspirations can feel like trying to catch a cloud and pin it down.
During my recent vacation, I faced an unexpected binge-eating challenge. Reflecting on this experience taught me valuable lessons about my relationship with food and how to manage it better. Here's what I learned about binge eating during my vacation.
I'm looking for information for my sponsee. She and I are in OA. She is not a newbie but she is struggling how to manage bipolar with a 12-step program.
Can we chat?
but i do have some things i want to bring up
>people looking for "sourcemates" never really made sense to us, but we got manipulated into it anyway and all it ensued was gaslighting, brainwashing, and grooming. it has put us in abusive relationships many times until we put our foot down about it. though, i have seen people use "sourcecalling" as "hey we have the same source we got introjected from lol" and not "I SHARE MEMORIES FROM ANOTHER WORLD WITH YOU", so im glad that's dying down a bit.
however, this doesnt change the fact that some of us fictives can have these fake memories, especially after splitting since that disorients us/the alter, it is just important not to fuel them, as that would be delusion, and it has hurt us many times.
it is important to steer away from these beliefs, but also know some of those people could be being manipulated right now by fakers (like how we were manipulated ie) etc.
>"endogenic" is completely made up and scientifically impossible. endos claim they do not need any trauma at all to form did/osdd, this is far from true. i dont think you need me to tell you that though, it's just for people scrolling by mostly.
>a lot of people try to loop tulpamancy into did, which is harmful for both the disorder and the spiritual practice. a lot of people call themself "tulpagenic" system, meaning they think they just manifested their system willfully. this is, like endogenic, scientifically impossible, and tulpamancy has nothing to do with a dissociation disorder at all.
>i also disagree with people posting about their "system", ESPECIALLY on tiktok, like its some show or diary for them. not only is it extremely harmful for that system if they happened to be a real system making a bad decision - but if the person is faking being a system, then now they are spreading false info on did, which is why us as a real system get slurred and screamed at by people we called "friends" anytime we tell them after knowing them for a year or so. it is messed up and i agree with the disdain for tiktok.
>for us, some of our fictives formed off of recent medias we have seen before having a traumatic or dissociative experience. our brain i guess picks up stuff like that and thinks whatever qualities the fictional character had would be helpful to us and put it in an empty shell and formed that alter, which has always confused us and made us get scared of faking despite or diagnosis process. ive met confirmed diagnosed systems who also have this experience. none of us picks what the fictive is based on or when they form, the brain is a mystery. ive also come to conclusions autistic systems have higher chances of having more fictives/general introjects than non-introject alters.
>anyone who claims they "recently became a system" might be confused on their wording or how it works, or they might really just be faking. some people are newly discovered, which is VERY VERY VERY normal for us with DID. we usually wont notice it until we are older or something very drastic happens (being hospitalized because of a persecutor ie.) for us, we began to notice weird things more in 2018, then found out about it in 2020. which was awful. when you finally figure out what could be wrong, and then get medically recognized or a diagnosis, its both hell internally and socially, and this usually happens when you are a child/preteen/teen, which makes it even harder and people make a lot of bad and unhealthy mistakes with how to cope (like getting manipulated or being waayyy too open about it/using tiktok like a diary.)
>for alters "already knowing the ropes of the system", this has always made us very distrusting of other people, but there are many factors as to why that can possibly happen, or just at least to a short degree.
-they might be an osdd-1b system, meaning they have little to no amnesia, or just emotional amnesia.
-when they split, another alter or that system's friend already explained everything to them internally/privately, so of course you wouldnt see that.
-alters split from each other, so that can leave to those two alters having a lot of similarities, along with a few key memories that alter may have as an instinct in order to survive or function.
what ive found is its best to not fakeclaim a system based on a few things you know about them because of how different each system is. they could be a did system, an osdd-1a system, or a osdd-1b system - so if you were one of the three, you wouldnt be able to really understand the other two. many systems can also have different traumas, experiences, coping mechanisms, and their medical history (other disorders the body has, if they have a therapist or not, what theyve done to cope with did/osdd, etc.)
the only time i ever fakeclaim someone on this is if they are spewing factually proven incorrect statements as true, and maybe even putting ACTUAL true statements down, but i find it's best not to interact with fakers, as they are usually just baiting and they will never change their mind for you. it's best to just research correctly, (did-research.org is a good source.), and make sure you spread the correct info and tell people to watch out for endos/myths. though, i have seen cases where "endos" were manipulated into thinking they were endo (by someone giving them the wrong definition, usually being "endo means u dont remember trauma!" [ which is incorrect, that is still traumagenic.]) or they are in denial of their trauma. it's best not to assume, and arguing with endos is draining, so as i said, its better to educate generally than to argue directly.
this was long, but i hope any of this helps.
As a fictive, yes, we KNOW we arent the character. we are fully aware of that. while i do agree i and most others in our system HEAVILY dislike the "sourcecall" "sharing memories" stuff, as it never made sense to us, and even then when we blindly followed it somewhat, it was used to abuse us. so you are correct about that and i hope other systems who are newly diagnosed/process of diagnosis do not fall into the rabbit hole we did, but i should make it clear to you that most of us fictives DO experience these fake memories, especially when a fictive newly splits, a split in general leaves the alters and system disoriented and confused. a lot of DID communities online fueled our "psuedo memories" and it only harmed us.
fictives DO experience these fake memories, having them doesn't invalidate the existence. you just need to not fuel these "memories" because it can be harmful for that alter to the whole system. sorry that this was long, but a lot of your comments were borderline fakeclaiming fictives, which are proven to be real. yes, some fictives can be convinced they ARE the character, but it's them and their system's responsibility to alert them of the truth, instead of the entire concept of our (fictives) existence being claimed to be fake.